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Gay Dating Tactics: Your First-Date Do’s & Don’ts

Introduction

Nothing gets the heart pumping quite like the nervous anticipation that goes along with going out on a first date with a guy. Whether it’s a blind date or someone you’re already acquainted with, the first meeting with a dating prospect brings with it a host of emotions, more commonly a mixture of excitement and nervousness. As the pivotal moment approaches, thoughts can become centered on such questions as: “Will he like me?” “Will I like him?” “Is he going to be The One?” “What if I mess things up and make a fool of myself?” “What will I talk about? What if I run out of things to say?”

Everyone’s experience is different, but the one common denominator that most daters would testify to is that it can be difficult to navigate through the waters of man-to-man dating. Although it’s changing, we gay men have few role models to emulate when it comes to love and romance. There’s no template to follow and we were never taught how to flirt with and date other men. There are no rules, no structure, and no guidance. How do two men join together in the “courtship dance?” While a lack of rules for gay dating can be a positive thing, lending to more creativity, spontaneity, and individuality, it can also create anxiety and a sense of “cluelessness” in how to meet and date successfully–kind of like a car without a driver.

This article will offer some tips on how to approach your first date with that lucky guy you’ve chosen to get to know in sequence of that date’s occurrence. While these are by no means “rules”, these ideas can offer a means to ground yourself and make the most out of the experience without sabotaging it before it gets off the ground. Pick and choose the ones that seem right for you and create your own principles as a means of being a healthy dater who lives with integrity and follows his own values.

Before the Date

·When setting a time and place for your date, be sure to make it a short meeting (1-2 hours) for the first time and select a place that is either activity-oriented or allows for lots of opportunity to talk. Avoid movies and instead opt for a short get-together at a coffee shop or at the zoo. Making it brief takes a lot of the pressure off, especially if you find the two of you aren’t compatible, and allows for healthy pacing of your dating relationship. You can always extend the date if you’re getting along famously.

·Take the emphasis off of it being a date and instead view it as a chance to meet a potential new friend. This can help “take the edge off” and allow you to relax without focusing on the outcome of the date. Avoid placing too many hopes and expectations on the encounter; let it evolve naturally and if a spark ignites during your time together, then that’s an added bonus!

·If you’re particularly nervous, take some time to do some relaxation exercises (deep breathing, visualization, etc.) to help soothe yourself and get centered. If you’re worried about what to talk about, generate a list of possible ideas beforehand and role-play with a friend to build confidence. But don’t rely too much on this or you’ll appear stiff and rehearsed. Be cool and be yourself. This isn’t about performance.

·Dress comfortably and in clothing that makes you feel good about yourself. Make sure you and your date are on the same page about the style of dress for your date. In my own dating days, I showed up for a second date in a nice oxford shirt and jeans to then find my other half dressed to the nines in a French suit not realizing his intentions for the evening. It made for a very embarrassing moment and he cancelled the reservations he’d made for us for dinner at a ritzy, fine-dining establishment. He then changed into more casual clothes and took me to a family restaurant instead. Ouch! His image of me instantly changed and he stopped seeing me after that. He did us both a favor by ending things, but at the time it was quite humiliating. So be clear to avoid any miscommunication.

During the Date

·Be punctual and relax. No matter how attracted you may be to the man sitting across from you, it is your responsibility to be yourself–avoid trying to put up a façade and be someone you’re not to try to impress your date. You are great just as you are. Let him get to know the real you; otherwise, you’re engaging in a form of deception that will only come back to bite you later. Be authentic and eventually you’ll be rewarded with a truly compatible partner.

·Be attentive to your date. Show respect by maintaining good eye contact and don’t let those eyes stray if there are other attractive men in the room. Have an open posture and let your nonverbal communication and body language convey interest in learning about your date. Stay out of your own head and shut off those distracting thoughts; really listen to what he’s saying. Balance active listening with sharing things about yourself. Ask open-ended questions to gain more elaboration on points made in your discussion to stretch out conversations and learn more about your date. This is especially effective if you’re feeling shy or are short on things to say because it gets the other person talking more, allowing for more tidbits that you can start other dialogues about. Be positive and let your sense of humor shine through.

·Avoid controversial topics of discussion as these may be offensive to your date. You can ease into these the more you get to know him. Avoid alcohol, as this may alter your behavior, and stay away from sexual content and innuendo. Unless sex is the motivation for your date, introducing sexual talk into your first date can set the tone in an inappropriate direction. Discussions about sex and sexual preferences can come later after you’ve been able to establish more of a genuine, mature connection. Questions like “Are you a top or a bottom?” may appear crass at a first meeting and may cause an unfavorable impression of you to form in your date’s mind and image of you.

After the Date

·Whether your date was a smash hit or a disaster, exercise good manners and thank your new acquaintance for the date. If you’d like to see him again, state this and call him in a day or so to ask him out again. Don’t get caught up in the whole dating game of “How many days should I hold off to call him to avoid looking desperate?” or “I’m going to let him be the one to call me.” If you like him, take charge of your life and make that call. If you didn’t feel a “love connection” with the guy, thank him for the date and kindly and tactfully tell him that it’s not a match. While this may be extremely difficult, it’s always best to be honest and direct in a gentle, polite way. If you’d like to try to develop a friendship instead, suggest that. But be honest and direct and don’t tell him you’ll call him again if you really have no intention of doing so. That’s cruel.

·Do some de-briefing after your date and reflect on your conduct, as well as your date’s, and perhaps journal about the experience. How did you feel? How did you manage yourself during the date? What would you have changed? What went well? What did you learn about yourself as a result of this date? How would you rate the date and the guy you met? From what you can tell so far, is there compatibility with your personal requirements and vision for a life partner? Is he matching up thus far with your needs, wants, goals, and values?

Conclusion

Dating can be a nerve-wracking, daunting task, particularly with the absence of dating education available to us as gay men. What traditions and roles that our heterosexual counterparts have for dating are applicable for us, if any? What are we supposed to do?

The key is to have fun with dating and take a light approach. Dating is both an art and a science in my belief, combining common sense decision-making with self-awareness of what one wants and needs for a happy and fulfilling lifestyle. When your dating behavior is in alignment with your values and vision for a relationship, you’ll be living with integrity and will be able to approach all your dates with a more relaxed tone and confident demeanor. It will make the process much more easy-going and rewarding. Cheers to your dating success!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/54672

Asking for a Date

Whether a date’s spontaneous or planned, the first or the last date, or you’re young or old, sooner or later, going out with someone comes to this: Somebody has to ask for the date.

No matter how much or how little you plan (and regardless of your reputation, your Aunt Sylvia, the knot in your stomach, the advice of your friends, your New Year’s resolution, or your success with dating or lack thereof) nobody, with the possible exception of Adam, ever made a date without asking for it. I bet that even with God as the go-between, sooner or later Eve expected Adam to pony up and find the courage to ask if they could take a walk in Paradise, and if he didn’t, well, it explains a lot about the snake, don’t you think?

Face it, the only thing scarier than the first date is asking for the first date. But if you can remember that you’re not looking for a cure for cancer, that you won’t die even if he or she says “yes,” and that life as we know it will continue no matter what your potential date’s response, you may relax enough to actually (gulp) ask for a date.

Gazillions of perfectly normal (and lots of less than normal) people have all gotten nervous about asking for a date. You and I and everybody else are connected to a long line of sweating, nervous, stuttering, tongue-tied souls, and even the slick ones feel anxious on the inside about asking for a date. Do you feel better? No? Well, I was afraid of that. Never fear – in this chapter, I tell you some things that should comfort you in the asking, help you in the consummation, and protect you from any possible devastation beyond a teensy pinch on the ego.

Risking Rejection

The First Rule to asking for a date is this: No guts, no glory. The worst-case scenario is that the prospective date says no. At that point, you’re no worse off than you are at this very moment.

Rejection is definitely not fun, but a rejection is only one person’s opinion of you. You don’t like everyone, and not everyone is going to like you. If someone says no, then he or she misses out on getting to know how truly terrific you are.

Rejection can be the beginning of opportunity. Scads of hugely successful people just wouldn’t take no for an answer. Think about Fred Astaire: When he first went to Hollywood, a talent scout wrote, “Big ears, too skinny, big nose, can dance a little.” Many famous beauties and stars in many fields had to cope with someone’s negative opinion of them – nobody hasn’t faced rejection.

The question is: Are you going to let it get you down? Of course not! Alexander the Great probably conquered the world by the age of 30 because some shortsighted lass turned him down – maybe because he was too intense or short or something. Maybe that rejection made him want to make more than most

Grecians earn. (It’s a pun; say it out loud – but definitely don’t use it until the fourth or fifth date or after you’re married or your last kid leaves for college or your hearing has gone.)

Rejection means that that person says no but not that everyone will. You need to realize when no is no, when someone’s showing absolutely no interest. If someone consistently says no when you ask for a date, it’s okay to say, “Look, I hear that you’re not interested, and I don’t want to be a pest. If you ever change your mind, here’s my number,” or “I’ll call you in a year,” but then for heaven’s sake, don’t call any sooner than that. With time, the sting really does go away.

Conversely, if you really don’t want to go out with someone, don’t say, “Maybe” or “Call me next week.” Just say, “Thank you for asking, but it’s just not possible.” Remember that the world is a very small place. You may change your mind, or that person you turn down may marry your best friend or be in a position to hire you someday. There is no reason to ever hurt someone whose only sin is being interested in you, so be gentle but firm.

Rejection isn’t gender specific. It’s not any easier for guys to face rejection than it is for women. We’ve just programmed men for power, and asking someone out is boss, even if the whole experience is tinged with fear. Either sex can feel more powerful by taking the initiative and asking someone out.

A brush-off with style

The coolest rejection I ever got was from a guy who told me that he’d just gotten a call from an old girlfriend. He said, “She’s reemerged in my life, and I need to see where it goes. I’ll either marry her and invite you to the wedding, or I’d like to finally put it to rest. No matter what happens, I’d like to be able to call you.” Cool, huh?

Biology has nothing to do with the ability to tolerate possible rejection. Women, if you’ve never asked a guy out, you should do it for your own liberal education. Guys love it. However, they may think you’re hotter to trot (sexually) than you really are, so take that into consideration.

If you’re afraid of rejection, you may miss out on a lot in this life, which is pretty darned short as it is. See if you can put that angst away, take the chip off your shoulder, and go for it.

Improving Your Odds

When asking for a date, having a plan is crucial, but you’ve got to stay a little loose. The more structured you are, the more dependent you are on meshing well with a stranger. Therefore, you need to read the signs, stay loose, and keep things light, flexible, and open. You can seriously improve the chances of getting a yes if you keep these tips in mind when you ask for a date.

Never ask for a first date for a Friday or Saturday night

These two main, big, serious date nights are too important a place to start. Asking for a first date on a Friday or Saturday is like playing at Wimbledon without a tennis lesson or having ever played on grass or at all. Even people who don’t have dates and haven’t had one for ages are often loathe to admit their plight to a stranger (and if you haven’t had a first date, you’re still strangers).

Start off with a Wednesday or Thursday night, which are nights when people generally don’t have much planned. Also avoid Mondays like the plague. Everybody hates Mondays.

Never say, “Would you like to go out sometime?”

If you phrase the invitation like this and the askee says “no,” you’ve left yourself absolutely no out except to be swallowed up by a prayed-for earthquake.

If the person says “yes,” you still have to ask him or her out. Yikes. Instead, be specific. It’s much better to say, “I’d love to see the new exhibit at the museum. Any interest in going either Wednesday or Thursday?” You offer a specific opportunity (as well as alternative days) and at the same time, you give your potential date a great deal of room in which to negotiate without sounding wishy-washy or desperate. Giving specifics also allows your potential date a couple of seconds to think about it, rather than getting caught completely off guard.

Always offer options about the date

Options can include the day, time, activity, and transportation. Options make you sound organized without being bossy or rigid, as long as you keep them limited. Offering a few choices at the outset makes you sound less panicky than you would if you were to offer them after the potential date says no to your initial suggestion.

If you’re specific about the date and your potential date doesn’t like the suggested activity but does like you, you can modify your plan.

Also, although a plan with several separate possibilities requires more work on your part, it offers a better chance of success – and a chance to figure out whether your potential date has any interest in you. After all, if you’ve offered all options regarding place, time, date, activity, and so on and the answer is still no, the problem is as clear as the writing on the wall, and you’ve hit the wall. Take a deep breath and move on. It’s not the end of the world, just this potential date. Scary but efficient.

By offering to meet there, go in separate cars, or pick her up, you instantly show yourself to be considerate, capable, and sensitive to the fact that females have heard horror stories about being abducted by a date and never seen again.Although you’re not Jack the Ripper, understanding that she may feel a little uneasy about being in a car with a stranger makes you a liberated and cool guy for thinking like a modern woman. You will score major points.

In the initial stages of dating, people sometimes want so much to be liked that they agree to things at the expense of their integrity. If your potential date has enough sense to say, “I’d love to do something with you, just not mud wrestling,” then give that person a gold star. Don’t be offended – be pleased. You have just found someone with brains, courage, and honesty.

Remember that timing is everything

Don’t ask for tomorrow or next year. A basic rule is to ask for a first date a week to ten days in advance, but you can break this rule with impunity as the need arises. You can ignore these guidelines if the spirit moves you to be spontaneous. For example, “Hey, got time for an ice cream cone?” can get you an immediate yes; you can also expand this invitation to a “maybe next week” if you get a no.

Now is always a better time to ask than later because your courage may diminish over time. There are some obvious exceptions to this rule: Don’t ask someone who is in a crisis (never ask for a date at a funeral), just getting out of a relationship (never ask for a date at a divorce hearing, even if the person isn’t one of the parties involved; it’s bad karma), or going through any other experience when you may appear to be exploiting a weakness. You need to take the other person’s life situation into account as well.

Always go for it if you’re having a good hair or anything else day

You’re cuter when you’re happy, and self-confidence is sexy. Don’t get into the “well, today is a write-off, I may as well ask, get rejected, and make it a perfect score” mentality. You can tolerate being turned down more easily when you’re feeling strong – not to mention that rejection is a lot less likely.

Asking someone out for a first date isn’t the time to trot out your best anything, including your imagination, checkbook, or best friend. This is a time to think KISS: Keep it Simple, Sweetie. All you want to do here is send a clear and gentle but important message: I’d like to spend some time getting to know you better. Are you interested?

The Invitation: Sending the Message

You have several options when actually asking for the date. The choices may be influenced by circumstances (like distance), personality, and personal style. In general, the closer you are when you ask, the better. When you’re close to the person, you get more information, you appear more courageous, and you get some practice for the date.

Answering machine etiquette

An answering machine message, unlike an offthe- cuff remark or rumor or discussion, can be saved and replayed and misinterpreted and overanalyzed and overreacted to and thrown back in your face. Not only that, but you never know who’s going to be listening on the other end. Here are six messages never to leave on a date’s machine:

1. You’re the best I’ve ever had.

2. I never want to see you again.

3. It’s me. Give me a call.

4. Next time, we’ll go out.

5. Your mother is hot.

6 Can I have your friend’s phone number?

You can adapt any of the following methods for sending the message to your level of comfort. But be careful that you’re not hiding behind your comfort level – sooner or later, you’re going to have to get out there and actually date.

1. Asking in person: When possible, this is the best way to ask by far because seeing the person face-to-face gives you the most information. You can read body language and see whether the potential date looks pleased, terrified, God-forbid-revolted, or delighted. Based on the other person’s reaction, you can then modify your behavior accordingly or run. The disadvantage with asking in person is that it’s also the scariest for the exact same reasons. But it’s still preferred and also the friendliest technique.

2. Asking on the phone: This method gives you less information, but if you get panicky, you can always hang up before they answer (although caller ID has made hanging up without saying anything a great deal trickier). When you ask over the phone, nobody can see your palms sweating; but then again, you also can’t see your potential date’s reaction.

Never ask an answering machine for a date. It’s cowardly, sends the wrong message (you’re manipulating them by making them call back before you ask them out), and occasionally, the machine actually eats the message. You never know if your potential date got the message or if it was intercepted by a protective parent, a jealous ex, a careless roommate, or the Fates.

3. Asking through a third party: In elementary school, you may have asked your best friend to ask her best friend if someone liked you. You may have even eventually gotten an answer, but after Suzy told Peter, and Peter told you, were you really 100 percent sure about the answer? Third parties are a very unreliable method of information flow. When other people get involved, sometimes they add their two cents to your message. For example, what if your best friend liked me and wanted you to ask me if I’d go out on a date with him? Can you see lots of room for sabotage and miscommunication?

Remember the story of our Pilgrim forefathers, John Alden and Miles Standish? Miles was the governor who asked his best friend John to intercede on his behalf with Priscilla Mullens. Priscilla decided she liked the messenger, and Miles was left out in the cold. Don’t ask somebody else to ask for your date. The messenger may end up taking your potential date, and then not only do you still need a date but you also need a new friend.

4. Asking with a note: Even though computers have made notes faster and sexier, notes don’t offer you much information and feedback, whether they’re e-mail or snail mail (through the post office). When you ask with a note, you also don’t know the mood your potential date may be in. In addition, a note opens the opportunity for interception, misinterpretation, a delay in feedback, and a lack of flexibility. Ask anybody who’s asked for an RSVP to a written invitation, and you begin to understand the problem with asking for a date through a note. If you’re absolutely determined to ask for a date in writing, I suggest a handwritten note via the post office because it’s classier and implies more effort and concern.

A brief note here on sending a note with flowers, cigars, wine, a baseball hat, a ticket, or any gift: Sending gifts with the note is cute but tricky. You don’t want to appear to be bribing your potential date on the first date. Gifts can be a token of respect and admiration and are okay and even valuable as you’re getting to know each other, but they can be too much too soon. Besides, you don’t want to have to top yourself later and end up buying your potential date a small country by the fourth date. Start out simply.

Getting an Answer

Okey, dokey – you’ve made plans, offered options, and asked for a date. Now what? Well, either the answer is yes, you have a date, or no, you don’t. If the answer is yes, you’re flying and ready to go on to planning the old date-aroony.

Dealing with a no

If the answer is no, you have nothing to lose by asking if another day, place, time, or event would suit them. Listen to the response carefully. Often people really are tied up working late, taking care of a sick parent, getting out of a relationship, studying, or being distracted and would be willing to consider an invitation in the future, just not now.

If you’re feeling brave, you can say, “If not now, how soon?” If you’re feeling a bit vulnerable, you can say, “Let me give you my number, and you can give me a call when you’re ready.” The middle ground is to say, “Why don’t I give you a holler in a week or two and see how you’re doing?” If your potential date says fine, then do it. If he or she says “I’ll call you,” don’t hold your breath. Who needs to turn blue?

Getting some feedback

If you get a no, you may want to take a minute to try to figure out why. Make sure you haven’t gotten into some bad habits. You may need to ask yourself some tough questions. Are you too eager, too desperate, too whiny, too silly, or too tense? Is your breath okay? Do you make eye contact?

No matter how honest you think you are, give yourself some balance by asking a willing friend to critique your approach (you’ve seen it in a million movies where the hero or heroine practices in front of a mirror – no, not Travis Bickle’s “You lookin’ at me?” line). Balance your friend’s feedback with your own opinion so that you’re not being too easy or too harsh on yourself. If you mess up your careful scenario, your friend can give you some tips and hints on improving it, and you can make sense of what you meant to say or do.

Practicing can help you get a grip on your nerves. A little nervousness is flattering to the potential date because it shows that you really want to get to know him or her. Too much nervousness can panic both of you. All things considered, it’s probably even better to be a little bit nervous than so nonchalant and cool that your potential date has the sense you couldn’t care less if he or she accepts your invitation or not, because if he or she isn’t interested, no biggie, it’s not them, you’ll just move on to someone else. It’s not a terrible idea to start a first date on an honest basis. I know – don’t tell anybody I told you, and we’ll try to keep it our dirty little secret.

Dating Advice [http://www.datingsecret.org] takes one of the most complicated, anxiety-filled social rituals we have and provides the reader with an easy-to-understand handbook for success. Short of sending flowers, I can think of no better way to survive dating as we head into the 21st century!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/1146068

How To Make A Great Success Of A Blind Date

In many ways blind dating is no different than any other type of dating. The basic elements of dating still exist but you do need to exercise more caution in a blind date. Like any other date you want a blind date to go well so that you can ensure yourself a second date. However, while it is important to exercise caution in all types of dating it’s even more important in blind dating. Another factor unique to blind dating is getting set up with a great date. While this may not always be in your hands there are some ways that you can take some initiative in this area.

Like any date the key to a blind date is setting yourself up for a second date. Arranging a fun date and being interesting to your date are two keys to achieving a second date. In making conversation on a blind date, it is important to take an interest in what your date has to say. Doing this will let them know that you are interested in getting to know them better. Also, try speaking about subjects that you really enjoy. This will make you not only sound more natural but will also make you sound more interesting.

Dressing to impress is also critical to a blind date. In meeting someone for the first time you will want to ensure that you make a good first impression. You don’t always know how much a blind date already knows about you but it doesn’t hurt to show up for the date looking as though you have put a great deal of effort into your appearance. You’re date will appreciate the effort and be flattered by your going out of your way to impress them.

One key factor to blind dating is to exercise caution in meeting your date. Even if you are being set up by a close friend you can’t be positive that they know the person they are setting you up with very well. It’s best to set up an initial meeting in a well lit and populated location. Never agree to meet someone you don’t know at a secluded location. While your blind date may be a wonderful person with no intentions of hurting you, it’s best to exercise caution on a blind date.

Another factor unique to the blind dating situation is getting yourself set up with a great date. You may have several friends that are interested in setting you up with a friend or relative whom they think is just perfect for you but try not to agree to go on a blind date that is set up by someone who doesn’t know you very well. If they don’t know you well, then don’t trust them to choose a date for you. However, if you have a friend who does know you very well, don’t hesitate to drop hints about what you are looking for in a date. Those who know you best are most likely to set you up with a compatible blind date.

Making an honest effort to have a good time on your date is another tip that can lead to a successful blind date. If you go into a blind date with the attitude that things won’t work out, you will most likely unconsciously put a damper on the date. Your date may sense your lack of enthusiasm and in turn won’t be inspired to put an effort into having a good time either.

Another tip for blind dating is to be sure to end the date appropriately. Many people may recommend that when going on a blind date you have a backup plan in place such as having a friend call you shortly after the date starts to give you an excuse to leave if things aren’t going well but doing this just isn’t right. Instead extend your blind date the same common courtesy that you would any other date and be willing to complete the entire date. If neither party is having a good time, it’s acceptable to end the date early and just agree that you weren’t compatible but don’t be too quick to give up on the date. Also, at the conclusion of the date be honest about your feelings towards your date. If things just didn’t work out, don’t be afraid to let them know instead of offering empty promises of future dates. However, if you truly enjoyed your date, let your partner know and take the opportunity to suggest a second date.

Bringing a friend along is another tip for blind dating. This is helpful for a couple of reasons. First if your blind date had any malicious intentions towards you, having a friend along is likely to spoil his plan. Secondly a friend may be able to ease the tension and break the ice by getting the conversation started. While the addition of an extra person on a date may seem awkward, having them there can provide emotional spirit and an additional comfort level.

Even if the date is going well, another tip for blind dating is to end the date after 2-3 hours. This is an adequate amount of time for two people to get to know each other on a date and determine whether or not they would be interested in a second date. Blind dates that last longer than this often reach a point where the couple runs out of things to talk about and the date can stagnate leaving a negative feeling at the end of the date. Keeping the date short can help you to end the date on a positive note and will leave you with more to talk about on a second date.

Being yourself is important on any date but it’s critical on a blind date. A blind date deals with someone who does not know you so it’s important to give them a true sense of yourself on your date. You may get away with pretending to be something you are not on the first date but it may lead to trouble in future dates as your date realizes you were phoney on the first date.

Finally, treat your blind date with the same courtesy that you would any other date. You may not know the person you are dating but it is important to arrive on time, be polite and put an honest effort into the date. Your blind date is just as deserving of these courtesies as any other person you have dated. A blind date is no excuse to let your manners lapse and mistreat your date.

For the most part blind dating does not differ from any other dating situation. However, there are a few things unique to blind dating of which you should be aware. Most importantly it is critical that you not put yourself in danger by agreeing to meet a blind date in a secluded location. Another unique aspect of the blind date is that you are often set up by a friend or family member so you have the opportunity to learn what they think would be a suitable match for you. Beyond the specifics related to blind dating, the rules of regular dating still hold true. If you are polite, genuine, fun and interested in your date you will be likely to score a second date.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/178142

Best massage salons in Bucharest

There is no doubt that receiving a massage is good for your mind body and soul. If it’s such an important part of living a healthy lifestyle, why don’t we all do it more often?
Massage is one of the oldest natural therapies. It contributes to physical and emotional health and to practical exercises, can stimulate and relax muscles, improve circulation and promote the healing of a wide variety of suffering. Massage is easy to achieve.
Relaxation massage is all about relaxing. It focuses on giving the client time to recover from the stresses of daily life. When you experience relaxation massage, you can expect a treatment that involves:
Long smooth gliding strokes that are rhythmic and flowing
Pressure that is deeply relaxing, but not painful
A treatment that is designed to soothe and relax you, not to relieve chronic pain or other underlying ailments.
A therapist who also takes the massage environment into account – look for soothing music, warm luxurious towels, and occasionally the use of essential oils to enhance both the environment and the effects of the massage
As with any kind of massage, the benefits of a relaxation massage can last for several days after your treatment.

Relaxation massage – like other forms of massage – can offer the following benefits:
Lowering blood pressure – at least for a while
Improvements to peripheral circulation
Improvements to skin tone and appearance
Improvements to gastrointestinal motility (bowel movements will become more regular)
Some reduction in muscle tension including the relief of muscle tension headaches
Improvements to any stress-related symptoms. This can include providing a gentle boost to the immune system if you undergo regular treatments.

There are different types of body massage and you are wellcome to try them all, or the one that is the best for you:

Swedish Massage Therapy

Swedish massage is virtually synonymous with massage therapy. Swedish massage is based on the Western concepts of anatomy and physiology, compared to the energy-centric style more common in Asian forms of massage. Using lotion or oil, massage therapists typically begin with broad general strokes and then transition to specific strokes to address problem areas. As the best-known type of bodywork performed today, one of the primary goals of the Swedish massage technique is to relax the entire body. This is accomplished by rubbing the muscles with long gliding strokes in the direction of blood returning to the heart. But Swedish massage therapy goes beyond relaxation. Swedish massage is exceptionally beneficial for increasing the level of oxygen in the blood, decreasing muscle toxins, improving circulation and flexibility while easing tension. Additional Swedish massage techniques include circular pressure applied by the hands and palms, firm kneading, percussion-like tapping, bending and stretching. Before and during your Swedish massage session, communication is encouraged with your professional massage therapist so that your massage is customized to your specific needs.

Aromatherapy Massage

An aromatherapy massage is a Swedish massage with scented plant oils (known as essential oils) added to the massage oil. Extracted from flowers and other plant parts, essential oils offer a pleasing scent and are believed to have healing properties. Lavender and rose, for instance, are known to promote relaxation. Although oils may be selected to address specific needs, the therapist typically uses pre-blended oils to relax, energize, or uplift. Your massage therapist will usually decide which essential oils to use, but you can let them know if you have a preference. Essential oils are diluted before being applied to the skin. During the massage, you’ll be given a full-body massage while inhaling essential oils through a diffuser and absorbing them through your skin. Sometimes an aromatherapy massage will only focus on your back, shoulders, and head. You won’t wear any clothing other than underwear, which is optional.

Hot Stone Massage

As the name implies, hot stone massage uses warm stones. The therapist places heated, smooth stones on specific points on the body and also holds the warm stones while giving the massage. The stones are usually basalt (a volcanic rock that retains heat well). The warmth of the stones can be relaxing and can loosen tight muscles so that the therapist can reach areas of muscle tension quickly. Stones used for the heat massage are river-smoothed stones that are heavy enough to healing pressure but light enough to avoid discomfort. Some believe that the stones are symbolic of the forces of nature as they are smoothed and molded by the gentle but influential power of the river. The smoother the stone, the more energy it is believed to hold. The stone massage is performed by placing heated or cooled stones along the client’s back, specifically upon the meridians seen in acupressure techniques. The stones then help the body retain their healing heat which in turn enter the muscles and melt away stress. In addition to river stones, some massage therapists use a tool called a body rock. The body rock is carved from stone or found and smoothed for comfort. It helps to enhance the therapist’s strength during the massage and helps focus the pressure being applied to the body. Many therapists use this tool directly on the skin but it can also be paired with massage oil or even used over the client’s clothes.

Thai Massage

Thai Massage is new to modern spas, but it is actually an ancient form of massage thought to have been developed by Buddhist monks in Thailand 2,500 years ago. It uses passive stretching and gentle pressure along the body’s energy lines to increase flexibility, relieve muscle and joint tension and balance the body’s energy systems. A unique blend of assisted yoga, passive stretching, and pressing massage movements, Thai massage is more energizing than other forms of massage. It’s a little bit like yoga without doing the work, as the therapist moves and stretches you in a sequence of postures, usually on a mat on the floor.This is why it is sometimes called “lazy man’s yoga”. Thai massage can be both relaxing and energizing, so it is a good choice if you want to be active after your massage.
The therapist uses a variety of different sequences of techniques on clients, who are either laying face up, laying face down, seated, or on their side.

Massage therapy is a treatment approach which is growing in demand and popularity. It was once considered an alternative or fringe approach, but it is now becoming much more mainstream. More importantly, now that massage therapy is considered a mainstream treatment option, many insurance companies provide coverage for treatment sessions. This form of therapy involves hands-on techniques to increase circulation, relieve tension, reduce stress, relieve anxiety, improve sleep, and promote relaxation throughout the entire body, as well as many other benefits.
The body’s soft tissue areas include the muscles, tendons, connective tissue, etc. If someone is tense and in need of a release, or they have been injured and have extensive muscle and/or nerve tissue damage that plagues their body, massage therapy might be worth exploring. Here are some benefits of massage therapy.

 

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Benefifts of massage:

1. It Is Relaxing – When the body is tense and under stress, it produces unhealthy levels of the well-known stress hormone, cortisol, which can contribute to weight gain, sleeplessness, digestive problems, and headaches. Massage therapy has been shown to decrease cortisol levels in the body. This enables the body to enter a recovery mode. Moreover, this form of therapy also triggers lasting feelings of relaxation, improved mood, and reduced stress levels.

2. It Reduces Stress – Not only can massage therapy help with stress relief, but regular massage sessions over a prolonged period of time can boost energy levels, reduce pain, and stimulate individuals on physical as well as emotional levels.

3. It Can Help Lower Blood Pressure – Regular massage therapy sessions have been found to reduce blood pressure levels. In fact, some long-term studies have shown that a consistent massage program can reduce both systolic (upper number) and diastolic (lower number) blood pressure. Moreover, it can also reduce cortisol levels within the body. Furthermore, consistent massage sessions can also reduce trigger sources for anxiety, hostility, tension, and depression. In turn, lower blood pressure levels can also reduce
the risk of heart attack, stroke, and/or kidney failure, as well as many other health issues.

4. It Promotes Muscle Relaxation – The purpose of massage therapy is to target the source of the body’s pain via eliminating tense muscles, increasing flexibility, and providing relaxation to the affected muscles as well as the body as a whole. Massage also promotes circulation to the affected or injured muscles, which increases nutrients and oxygen to the damaged tissues. In turn, this increased activity to the affected sites
reduces stiffness and edema (swelling) in the muscles and joints, as well as increases flexibility to help reduce pain. Moreover, this form of therapy also releases endorphins (pain-killing hormones), which boost the dopamine and serotonin levels in the body. These hormones assist the body in many ways–physically as well as emotionally. Case in point, they promote healing, pain management, and feelings of euphoria, as well as help to calm the nerves.

5. It Can Help Improve Circulation – The long-term benefits of massage therapy are not to be underestimated. Improved circulation is part of a snowball effect that occurs in the body as a result of receiving regular therapy on a consistent basis. This is because proper circulation brings damaged, stiff, and tense muscles the rich blood supply they need to promote healing. Moreover, massage also promotes improved circulation via the use of hands-on pressure, which moves the blood through the damaged and congested areas of the body. In turn, the release of this same pressure causes new blood to flow into tissues. Furthermore, the squeezing, twisting, and pulling action of the massage technique also removes lactic acid from the muscle tissues. As a result, this action improves the lymph fluid circulation, which carries metabolic waste products away from internal organs and muscles. In turn, this results in lower blood pressure levels and improved overall body function.

6. It Can Help Improve Posture – Many Americans experience back, neck, and muscle pain from a variety of sources. However, the primary cause of this pain results from poor posture. In fact, chronic back pain, massage is the number one reason for missed work days and second most common cause of disability, is often the result of incorrect or poor posture while standing and/or sitting. Moreover, being overweight, poor posture, and repetitive or overuse movements can also contribute to the strain on the back and other
potential problem areas. As a result, the added strain often causes spasms, pain, and tense muscles in the hips, glutes, back, neck, and legs. Massage therapy can help get the body back into proper alignment. In fact, improving one’s posture can be one of the most beneficial and relaxing aspects of massage therapy. Massage allows the body to relax and loosen the muscles made tense and sore via bad posture. In turn, this allows the body to position itself in its organic and pain-free posture. As part of a consistent massage therapy program, the body’s muscles are loosened and relaxed. Moreover, the joints have greater freedom, flexibility, range of motion, and pressure points are relieved. As a result,
the body is able to position itself in an organic and healthy posture. In short, massage therapy helps to correct the positions and movements developed over time as a reaction to pain.

7. It Can Help Strengthen the Body’s Immune System – Regular massage sessions provide many benefits to the human body. It is a well-known fact that individuals who experience high levels of stress are more vulnerable to illness and injury. When stress is combined with sleep disturbances and poor nutrition, the impact is directed at the body’s immune system. Its ability to naturally protect itself against infections, pathogens, and bacteria is greatly reduced. Some might wonder how massage therapy benefits the immune system. Studies have indicated that regular massage sessions not only help reduce stress, but can also boost the immune system’s cytotoxic capacity (activity level of the body’s natural “killer cells”) and enhances the body’s ability to deliver nourishment. Moreover, massage therapy can be a great addition to any exercise program. Much like regular exercise can keep the body fine-tuned, regular massage therapy can help keep the immune system strong and resilient.

Once considered an alternative or fringe approach, massage therapy is now much more mainstream and growing in popularity. More importantly, now that massage therapy is considered a mainstream treatment option, many insurance companies provide coverage for treatment sessions. This form of therapy involves hands-on techniques to increase
circulation, relieve tension, reduce stress, relieve anxiety, improve sleep, and promote relaxation throughout the entire body, as well as many other benefits.